12 Steps to raise a juvenile delinquent

19 03 2008

These comes from a leaflet from the Houston Police Department. It is apparently very old, there has been a little update. I believe it still applies.

  1. Begin with infancy to give the child everything he/she wants. In thins way he/she will grow up to believe that the world owes him/her a living.
  2. When he/she picks up bad words, laugh at him/her. This will make him/her think that it is cute.
  3. Never give him/her any spiritual training. Wait until he/she is is twenty-one and then they can decide for themselves.
  4. Avoid the use of the word “wrong”. He/she may develop a guilt complex. This will condition him/her to believe later, when he/she is arrested , that society is against him/her and he/her is being persecuted.
  5. Pick up everything he/she leaves lying around. Do everything for him/her so that he/she will be experienced in throwing all responsibility on others.
  6. Take his/her side against neighbors, teachers, and policemen. They are all prejudiced against your child.
  7. Quarrel frequently in the presence of your children. In this way they won’t  be so shocked when the home is broken up later.
  8. Give the child all the spending money he/she wants. Never let them earn their own.
  9. Satisfy his/her every craving for food, drink, and comfort. See that his/her every sensual desire is gratified.
  10. Let him/her read any printed material, what any movie or TV show, and listen to any music he/she can get his/her hands on. Be careful that the silverware and drinking glasses are sterilized, but let their mind feast on garbage.
  11. When he/she gets into real trouble, apologize to yourself by saying, “I could never do anything with him/her.”
  12. Prepare for a life of grief. You will likely have it.
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